Common Mistakes Counselors Make When Learning Child-Centered Play Therapy

by Dr. Lauren Chase, PhD, LCMHC, NCC, BC-TMH, PMH-C

Child-centered play therapy (CCPT) is one of the most developmentally appropriate and evidence-based approaches for counseling children. Grounded in person-centered theory, CCPT allows children to express thoughts, emotions, and experiences through play rather than relying solely on verbal communication. For many counselors and counselors in training, however, learning this approach requires a significant shift in how therapy is conceptualized. Clinicians who are accustomed to directive interventions, structured techniques, or cognitive approaches may initially struggle with the non-directive and relational nature of play therapy.

Learning CCPT often requires counselors to slow down, tolerate uncertainty, and trust the therapeutic relationship. While this transition can feel challenging at first, it is also what makes the approach so powerful. Below are several common mistakes counselors make when learning child-centered play therapy and how developing play therapists can strengthen their clinical work.

Dr. Lauren Chase, PhD, LCMHC, NCC, BC-TMH, PMH-C is a licensed clinical mental health counselor and the founder of Climbing Hills Counseling, PLLC.

Expecting Children to Communicate Like Adults

One of the most common early mistakes counselors make when learning play therapy is expecting children to communicate verbally in the same way adults do. Counselors may ask frequent questions or encourage children to explain their thoughts and feelings through conversation. Children, however, communicate differently. Their primary mode of expression is play. Landreth (2012) explains that play functions as the child’s natural language, while toys serve as the child’s words. When children are given the opportunity to engage in self-directed play within a therapeutic environment, they communicate internal experiences symbolically through actions, stories, and interactions with toys.

Developmental research also supports this understanding. Piaget (1962) noted that children do not fully develop abstract reasoning abilities until approximately age eleven. As a result, younger children rely more heavily on concrete experiences and symbolic play to process and communicate emotional experiences. For counselors in training, this means the therapeutic task is not to encourage children to talk more, but to learn how to observe, track, and respond to play behavior in ways that facilitate emotional expression.

Talking Too Much in Sessions

Another common challenge for counselors learning CCPT is becoming uncomfortable with silence or extended periods of play. This discomfort can lead therapists to ask questions, interpret the child’s behavior, or guide the session verbally. In child-centered play therapy, however, excessive talking can interfere with the therapeutic process. Landreth (2012) emphasizes that the counselor’s role is to create a safe therapeutic relationship in which children feel free to express themselves through play rather than therapist-directed conversation.

Instead of questioning or directing the child, counselors are encouraged to use facilitative responses such as tracking behavior, reflecting feelings, and recognizing the child’s efforts and choices. These responses communicate empathy and acceptance while allowing the child to remain in control of the play. For counselors in training, learning to tolerate silence and trust the process of play is an essential part of developing competence in CCPT.

Attempting to Direct the Child’s Play

Counselors new to play therapy often feel tempted to guide the child’s play toward specific themes or therapeutic goals. This may involve suggesting toys, directing activities, or encouraging particular storylines. Child-centered play therapy, however, is intentionally non-directive. The child leads the session while the therapist follows the child’s process. Axline (1947) emphasized that children should be given the freedom to express themselves in their own way and at their own pace.

When therapists take control of the play, the session can begin to reflect the therapist’s agenda rather than the child’s internal experience. Allowing children to guide the play process helps them explore emotions, resolve internal conflicts, and develop a sense of competence and autonomy. For counselors learning CCPT, trusting the child’s capacity for growth and self-direction is a fundamental shift in clinical perspective.

Over-Interpreting the Child’s Play

Counselors in training sometimes feel pressure to analyze the symbolic meaning of children’s play. For example, a therapist might assume that aggressive play reflects anger toward caregivers or that dollhouse play represents family conflict. Although symbolic meaning is present in children’s play, interpreting these meanings too quickly can interrupt the therapeutic process. Landreth (2012) emphasizes that the therapist’s role is not to explain the child’s play for the child, but to create space for the child to discover meaning through the experience of play itself.

Instead of interpreting, therapists can respond with observational reflections such as:

“You are making the dinosaur roar very loudly.”

“That looks like a big battle between the soldiers.”

These responses acknowledge the child’s experience while allowing the child to attach their own meaning to the play.

Focusing on Techniques Instead of the Therapeutic Relationship

Counselors learning play therapy often focus on mastering techniques such as tracking, reflecting feelings, or limit setting. While these skills are important, the most significant factor in child-centered play therapy is the therapeutic relationship. CCPT is grounded in person-centered counseling theory, which emphasizes empathy, unconditional positive regard, and authenticity as the core conditions necessary for psychological growth (Rogers, 1957). In play therapy, these relational conditions are experienced through the therapist’s consistent presence, emotional attunement, and acceptance of the child.

Landreth (2012) emphasizes that the relationship itself becomes the vehicle for change in play therapy. When children experience a therapist who is emotionally present, consistent, and accepting, they develop greater self-awareness, emotional regulation, and confidence.

For counselors in training, learning to prioritize the therapeutic relationship over technique is one of the most important aspects of becoming an effective play therapist.

Setting Too Many Limits in the Playroom

Beginning play therapists often struggle with determining when to set limits in the playroom. Out of uncertainty or discomfort, counselors may restrict children’s play more often than necessary. Limit setting is important when safety or the therapeutic relationship is at risk. However, excessive limits can reduce the child’s sense of autonomy and freedom within the play environment. Effective play therapists learn to balance freedom with responsibility. Therapeutic limit setting allows children to express emotions safely while maintaining a predictable and secure environment. Over time, this process helps children develop self-control and emotional regulation.

Final Thoughts

Learning child-centered play therapy often requires counselors to unlearn habits developed in more directive therapeutic models. Instead of leading the session, interpreting behavior, or solving problems, CCPT encourages therapists to trust the child’s capacity for growth within a safe and supportive relationship. For counselors and counselors in training, this shift may initially feel uncomfortable. With experience, however, many clinicians discover that slowing down, observing carefully, and trusting the therapeutic relationship allows children to express themselves in powerful and meaningful ways.

Developing competence in child-centered play therapy not only strengthens a counselor’s work with children, but also deepens their understanding of the therapeutic relationship across all client populations.

About the Author

Dr. Lauren Chase, PhD, LCMHC, NCC, BC-TMH, PMH-C is a licensed clinical mental health counselor and the founder of Climbing Hills Counseling, PLLC. Through her virtual private practice, she works with parents and high-achieving women navigating anxiety, life transitions, and self-doubt.

Her clinical approach integrates child-centered play therapy, cognitive behavioral therapy, and trauma-informed care, including EMDR. The relational skills foundational to child-centered play therapy, including attunement, emotional reflection, and creating psychologically safe therapeutic environments, continue to inform her work with adult clients, particularly high-achieving women and mothers navigating stress, perfectionism, and identity transitions.

Dr. Chase provides consultation to counselors and therapists across the United States who are seeking to strengthen their clinical work with children, families, and relational dynamics. She also provides clinical supervision for counselors in North Carolina who are working toward licensure and is accepting new clients in North Carolina, South Carolina, Florida, and Idaho.

To learn more about consultation, supervision, or counseling services, visit:https://www.climbinghillscounseling.com

References

Axline, V. M. (1947). Play therapy. Houghton Mifflin.

Bratton, S. C., Ray, D., Rhine, T., & Jones, L. (2005). The efficacy of play therapy with children. Professional Psychology: Research and Practice, 36(4), 376–390.

Landreth, G. L. (2012). Play therapy: The art of the relationship (3rd ed.). Routledge.

Piaget, J. (1962). Play, dreams and imitation in childhood. Norton.

Rogers, C. R. (1957). The necessary and sufficient conditions of therapeutic personality change. Journal of Consulting Psychology, 21(2), 95–103.